I suspect that the reason it got to be this way is because such a large percentage of U.S. citizens fought in wars during the 20th century. And while at war, the soldiers came to think of their fellow Americans as the most important "team" that they were part of. After all, it would've been your fellow American soldier who had your back while you were getting shot at.

I of course think your version of patriotism is healthier.

I think it's still worth recognizing, though, that patriotism is, fundamentally, a form of tribalism, which is a form of selfishness.

Selfishness isn't necessarily a bad thing. Everyone does have to "look after number 1" to some extent.

But just as a healthy community only tolerates so much selfishness in its constituents, we can only expect the global community to tolerate so much selfishness (which is to say, patriotism) in America.

We can be patriotic, but not in a way that is so antagonistic to the rest of the world.

I do think that focusing on domestic happiness, rather than military dominance, as you've suggested, is a good way to go about that.